Saturday, May 31, 2008

The Return of Lydia (Rated "R")





Oh Lydia, oh Lydia, say, have you met Lydia?
Lydia The Tattooed Lady.
She has eyes that folks adore so,
and a torso even more so.



Lydia, oh Lydia, that encyclo-pidia.
Oh Lydia The Queen of Tattoo.
On her back is The Battle of Waterloo.
Beside it, The Wreck of the Hesperus too.
And proudly above waves the red, white, and blue.
You can learn a lot from Lydia!

La-la-la...la-la-la.
La-la-la...la-la-la.

When her robe is unfurled she will show you the world,
if you step up and tell her where.
For a dime you can see Kankakee or Paree,
or Washington crossing The Delaware.

La-la-la...la-la-la.
La-la-la...la-la-la.

Oh Lydia, oh Lydia, say, have you met Lydia?
Lydia The Tattooed Lady.
When her muscles start relaxin',
up the hill comes Andrew Jackson.
Lydia, oh Lydia, that encyclo-pidia.
Oh Lydia The Queen of them all.
For two bits she will do a mazurka in jazz,
with a view of Niagara that nobody has.
And on a clear day you can see Alcatraz.
You can learn a lot from Lydia!

La-la-la...la-la-la.
La-la-la...la-la-la.

Come along and see Buffalo Bill with his lasso.
Just a little classic by Mendel Picasso.
Here is Captain Spaulding exploring the Amazon.
Here's Godiva, but with her pajamas on.

La-la-la...la-la-la.
La-la-la...la-la-la.

Here is Grover Whelan unveilin' The Trilon.
Over on the west coast we have Treasure Isle-on.
Here's Nijinsky a-doin' the rhumba.
Here's her social security numba.

La-la-la...la-la-la.
La-la-la...la-la-la.

Lydia, oh Lydia, that encyclo-pidia.
Oh Lydia The Champ of them all.
She once swept an Admiral clear off his feet.
The ships on her hips made his heart skip a beat.
And now the old boy's in command of the fleet,

for he went and married Lydia!


Well, I promised to keep you up to date on this Sordid Affair, so here are the latest additions. Some Color has been added and it's been given a bit of (Oriental) Character.
This is getting Kinda exciting. The Fuzz is thinking about another one himself. He like to passed out the first time, but things went better with the next. He's still got lots of room for more. Well, we'll see..................

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.
- Groucho Marx

Jandi for The Fuzz said...

It would appear that The Canuck recognized the quote.

Unknown said...

If you really want to look like Lydia, see "Lydia the Tattooed Lady Revealed" at by blog Lugubrious Drollery.

Unknown said...

Sorry, I meant my blog.